For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1: 13-14
For the last two months, I have avidly checked my email inbox as well as my facebook messages over and over throughout my days with a deep feeling of disappointment quite often when I leave the screen again. I enjoy reading about what my friends are up to, about their children or pets, or seeing pics of what they ate for dinner. I enjoy reading the blog posts from some of my favorite writers in the blogging world. I find spiritual encouragement and inspiration in those posts and also tips for being a better mom and teacher to my two children still living at home. I appreciate those tips and helps and inspiration so very much. They truly, at times, are a balm to my spirit and just the encouragement I need as I continue my trek through this life and through home education with two teenage boys.
But my spirit still longs for that one special message. My heart hopes that someday forgiveness will be granted to me from one whom I hurt. I love her so much and would never purposely hurt her. It's just that I am broken and imperfect and I make mistakes, sometimes big mistakes.
And she is also broken and imperfect and struggling right now with problems that are much deeper than I ever realized. And I said the wrong things and reacted in the wrong ways and now I am cut off and unforgiven. It hurts, badly!
I pray for her and I wait. It seems there is little more I can do, though I know the praying is the biggest thing I can do. Because the ONE who made us is the only one WHO can change us and heal our hearts. And I have deep faith in HIM. And so I wait and watch and pray, and sometimes cry.
I reassure myself that "this too shall pass." And I truly trust it will. And I rejoice that even though this one special soul in my life is struggling right now to forgive me and my failures, I know I am forgiven by my Creator and I have everlasting hope in His Son and she does also. Thank you Father for this! Thank you Jesus for redemption!
And so I continue to wait and watch, and pray, and sometimes cry and I hope she knows how much I love her.
Pressing On In Him,